


Human

by DivyBread



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-18
Updated: 2016-01-18
Packaged: 2018-05-14 20:45:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5758237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DivyBread/pseuds/DivyBread





	Human

Liza stared after the car that slowly drove away from her, the sun reflecting off its back window staying visible to her the longest of everything. When eventually even that disappeared in the far off distance too, she heaved a deep sigh.

And so had gone her last chance of redemption, Jake driving away in his ’99 Ford Escort. There would have been tears usually, but for some reason they didn’t quite make it past her eyes yet. Or at least she presumed it was yet. There was a possibility they never would. She didn’t deserve to cry them, after all, she had brought this upon herself. She had taken every step of the way herself.

Except, perhaps, that one kiss. She was hardly to be blamed for that one kiss. Liam had initiated that one to her complete and utter surprise and she had pulled away from it the second she had gathered her bearings.

The other kisses that followed later, however, those she definitely should be blamed for. Those she wasn’t going to try and get out from underneath – hadn’t tried to get out from underneath either, which was why the driveway was empty and Jake was no more. At least not as a part of her life. Because Jake, she was certain, still had plenty and plenty of years to live on this planet. Wonderful ones, she hoped. She really did hope so for him.

As for her… Well, yes, she really didn’t know what was to become of her. Turning back to the house, Liza took in the colourful blinds on the cute city building. A house they had picked out, a house they had decided they would live in, together. A house she now would inhabit on her own. All alone.

It wasn’t the initial anger Jake had portrayed, nor the following devastation that had settled in his expression. It hadn’t been the hurtful things he had thrown at her either, nor the way he’d thrown the basics of his belongings into his car and drove off. She felt like she deserved all of those. None of those things had caused her tears to fall, no. What forced the first drop from her eye onto her cheek was the sudden realisation that that night she was going to have to crawl into a cold bed alone and wait for just her body warmth to heat it up.

That night, and the next night, and the night after that. Endless nights alone in the cold bed.

The first sob wrecked through her chest with an intensity she could hardly contain and she quickly put herself into motion. Through the colourful door, into the cute city apartment. Feet touching the familiar wooden floorboards as she made her way over to the couch, first, then further on to the bathroom. The door closed behind her a little louder than she had intended it to, but it didn’t quite matter anymore because the first wail left her lips the moment her hands grabbed hold of the sink.

Jake had gone. He hadn’t forgiven her, of course not, she couldn’t nor wouldn’t blame him for that. But he had left. It was really, truly over. And although it had been over long ago in a way, and although she had known longer than him that it would end, it still hurt so, so bad. None of the comparisons seemed to properly describe how it felt, how her chest felt, how her throat felt, how her stomach felt, how everything was _aching._

Crying seemed to ease some of the tension in her chest, seemed to make it a little easier to bear, but only a little. She wanted to call someone to be able to take some of the sting away, but the question was who? Liam always knew how to take her mind off of things, but how much worse of a bitch was she going to be? Calling up Liam just as Jake had left the house? There was no better way to celebrate your boyfriend leaving than spending time with the guy you cheated on him with, of course.

But what were her options? Was she going to tell her girlfriends of the horrors she had done outside of their knowledge? Then again, was she going to tell Liam? Of course he had not known of her boyfriend. And he would never have to know. But wouldn’t that be cheating again? Shouldn’t she tell him as well what had been ongoing? No. Definitely not that. And he would be able to make her laugh again, he would not ask about the bad and instead point her towards the good. And he would be ecstatic to finally be allowed to see her place.

Her place. It hadn’t just been hers, it had been Jake’s too. Ten minutes after he left and she was already thinking of bringing another guy into it. But that was the ugly truth, wasn’t it? She had long accepted the fact that Jake was no longer at the top in her heart, and it had only been a matter of time before she would lose him and bring Liam officially up the steps to first place.

Guilt was gathered in the pit of her stomach, but it was guilt for the hurt she had brought the man she had loved for years, not for the desire she felt to call the man she had met a couple months ago. Swallowing, she turned her head down and picked her phone out of her pocket. Only a moment’s hesitation, really. Only a moment. Which made her feel even guiltier towards the man of years. But the text she sent went to the man of months instead.

_‘You got time? Can come over?’_

_‘Sure. Where at?’_

The response was instant, her phone beeping even before she had been able to tuck it fully back in her pocket. He had been waiting to hear from her, perhaps? A thought that thrilled her. Still, more guilt because of that spark of excitement going through her. Texting him the address, the next response was instant once more.

_‘Be there in 10 ;)’_

Questions, about her integrity, about how much of a bitch she was, about the horrible, horrible person she had become. So much doubt about herself, but still what she did was not cry more. Instead she started to clear the pictures, the clothes, the little details that had proven that she had lived there together with a guy up until just twenty minutes before. Horrible. She was horrible. But she was doing it nonetheless.

Liam didn’t even take ten minutes in the end, the doorbell ringing soon enough. Another spark of excitement shooting through her, another stab of guilt following it, only to be snuffed out as she opened the door and looked at Liam’s smiling face. Her own smile mirrored his instantly, the cheeky grin on his face already brightening her mood despite how low it had been just moments before.

“Hey you,” her guest spoke up, grinning and entering her house. She easily moved aside to let him, closing the door behind him and letting out a surprised chuckle when he reached out to pull her into him for a kiss. A quick one, probably, but it lasted a lot longer than he had intended it to be.

“Hey you,” she eventually managed to bring out as she finally pulled away. The ache had gone, replaced instead by the usual buzz of excitement and happiness she felt whenever Liam was showing her this kind of attention. “Meet _mi casa_.” Grinning at him, Liza took hold of his hand, pulling it from her side to be able to take him with her to the living room.

Letting him take a seat in the couch, she laughed in surprise as he tugged her into it by the hand he was still holding, allowing her to collapse on top of him and wrapping his arms around her. “I like it. But you better.”

Another chuckle. Then the smile of amusement as she settled herself properly and rested her head on his chest. Then another spark as he started to smile warmly at her, his expression turning what she liked to think of as loving. And there all the guilt seeped out of her system and all she could feel was warmth for this man.

A man of months, who somehow meant more now than the man of years. And really, that was okay. Maybe not how she had gone about it, maybe not how she had handled the sudden change in feelings. But it was okay that this man of months could so easily make her feel better. It was okay that she allowed herself to feel fine. She was allowed to feel fine. She was allowed to choose her and not feel selfish about it.

Not that she wouldn’t. She would. In the quiet, in the alone moments, in between certain hugs even, maybe. But she was not the bad guy.

She was just… Human.


End file.
